(100) I wish I had a Dad - by Rachel Maldonado (substack.com); see this substack article 'I wish I had a dad'...I showcase some stacks I find good and worth the read
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(100) I wish I had a Dad - by Rachel Maldonado (substack.com)
‘I was hungry.
I thought “I wish I had a Dad that I could call up and ask to take me to dinner.” I mean yes, I have plenty of food in my fridge and grocery stores are everywhere. Of course, I can make myself something to eat.
But my very favorite thing, is going out to dinner and . . . I wish I had a Dad.
That’s a common reframe I hear, even yesterday, that’s what people say to my face. I’m a Therapist and I own my Life Coach, of course, I hear about the absent, the dysfunctional and the abusive fathers.
Yet there are also amazing fathers and step-fathers in the world.
My girlfriend told me that her dad drove to her school, got her when she was sad in college.
Another girlfriend dined in the best restaurants as that’s where her dad took her, Michelin starred was his style.
I watched an endless parade of women walk down the aisle, escorted by their fathers on their wedding day.
When I hear about a good Dad, I get emotional. I wish I had a Dad too.
Like today, when hungry, wishing to eat out, I wish I had a Dad on speed dial to call. It’s not just that I want to have dinner on Daddy’s dime, I want to know that I can make that call, have that support when I want it. Because I never had it . . .
Perhaps it’s on my radar because this month April, is when my dad died a couple of years ago. I got the call from my sister, I did not cry on the phone nor did I go to his memorial service. That was my choice, never had a good father.
My 3rd highest viewed Substack is this one: Women with Daddy Issues I know that I’m not alone, others feel as I do, they want a good Dad too.
My highest viewed Substack was on Covid and second to that was the one titled Men who understand women Both those articles were promoted by Dr. Paul Alexander via his Substack, his articles get millions of hits, I’m thankful he encouraged me to start my Substack. But the one I wrote on Women with daddy issues was a stand alone, not promoted by others, also behind a paywall. It’s my 3rd highest viewed Substack, others feel as I do, they want a good Dad too.
I take responsibility for every choice I’ve made, my mistakes too. Yet it’s my belief, that if I’d had a good Dad and if my biological brother had lived, they would have looked out for me. I had to learn the hard way, no male role model or good father figure when I was a kid. No, I’m not counting the dad I had, the one for whom I didn’t show up to his memorial service. My mistakes are my own, but it would have been nice, if I’d had a good dad to look out for me.
I’m lucky now, I know many good men. Alphas. Studs. Masculine Men.
My two best friends, only a message away. Good men are everywhere.
In this video on Toxic Masculinity I only spent 1 minute 29 seconds on the topic because my focus is on the good men, they are everywhere.
There’s a reason I’ve stayed on message since I launched my Life Coach and Stories podcast in 2020. Connection is important, its family that matters. I’ve stayed on message for family over everything.
Family is in the top 3 of topics that I’ve messaged consistently.
Faith in God
Love of Country
Family over Everything
I don’t bend the knee to stupidity nor do I buy into the bullsh!t that women don’t need a man.
GOOD MEN are important, they matter.
For the fathers who take responsibility, you’re a Stud. At the core of Masculinity, is that you protect women and children. GOOD MEN ARE EVERYWHERE.
I’ve stayed on message.
It’s family that’s important.
Fathers matter a lot.
Don’t cry, Doll. I wish I had a Dad too . . .
#FamilyOverEverything
rhmaldonado.com’
I guess I was a lucky one, I was adopted at 9 months by two wonderful loving people, sadly my adopted mom died when I was 10 and my sister was 12. We were then raised by our dad, he was a great dad, he worked everyday to give us everything we needed or wanted, he was calm and understanding, I was a brat though as a kid, I was a kind child though, I loved my friends and my dad would comment on that, he would say "you should be a counsellor when you grow up. He was an awesome dad, he passed on New Years Eve in 1981.
I have seen the devastation in some of my friends lives because of the absence of a father and here I am fighting to be in my children’s lives and a court system that expects black fathers to be absent and so we end fighting system and the mothers, while the poor children carry the scars for generations to come. I hope that I will find a lawyer who is a great father and understands what fathers are up against. Time for fathers to take back their rights.